When it comes to money, absolutely nothing is simple. unless you're fortunate enough to be one of the favored few who never checks the price of things when you buy them, money just isn't simple. It's really, really difficult.
I don't know how to manage money as an adult yet. On Monday, I'm going to sign my first lease, and pay my first two months of rent. And then, I'll be broke again until the next pay day.
However, money is one of those things I'm actively working on learning to manage. I go through spurts of it. I haven't done as well this Summer as I had hoped to, although I do have some money coming to me in the next week or so. I hope.
I'm really scared about being an adult and paying real bills all of a sudden. What happens if I can't pay my rent for some reason? What do I do if something happens to my car? What on earth am I going to do?
In reality, I know I can afford this apartment. It is cheaper than the one I lived in before. I'll manage. I'll take out the loans I need, I'll do the work I have to do. I'm working nearly full time all the time, and that's fine by me.
It's just that, with Graduation looming in my future, I am finding myself more and more scared about being out from the safety net of School. My entire life has been about my education. Five days a week, 30 weeks a year, for 15 years, I've been in school. All of a sudden, I can feel myself wobbling on the edge of the precipice, and it seems as though not being poor would be a huge help.
If I didn't have student loans to pay, or if I made $10 an hour instead of $8, I wouldn't be so worried. But, I don't.
Like I said, I know we'll get through it, and everything will come 'round right. I'll get my dreams, be they built on gold mines or paperclips.
But if anyone has a donation to make to the cause... ;)